Soak in Sunlight Beams

The end of last week, first of this week, I was just drained. You know the kind...no muster for praying, reading. Spent. Every night. In bed far too late, seeking down time, cramming it in, too...not really finding it. Duty on duty. Needing rest...cease of demands...to truly sit down and unwind.

Day after day of not even having it in me to even do my class Bible study assignments, I finally got desperate and prayed, "God, fix me. I'm out of whack. I can't even get in whack." Yeah, that's how stupid I was sounding.

Middle of this week, I modeled a friend's pattern and took "Sabbath Rest" time for self. And I mean "TOOK"...as in, "to seize, lay hold of, as if, as it were, by force". (I made that up...pretty good, huh?) No formal worship, no praying. "Ceasing".

How? With three kids, you say? Responsiblities? One still at home? Visits? Grocery shopping? How do you "rest"?

Well, this time, here's what helped me. I did the "must do's"--laundry, dishes, food--anything that would make me feel very behind if I DIDN'T do them...otherwise, crossed it off my list. Postphone. No can do. Until rest came. I'm too busy.

In the meantime...

I napped.

I sat down.

I watched TV.

I rested.

I took baths, not showers.

I put off calls, letters, cards.

Now, if God told me to specifically add it back in, do it...I did it.

Ah. Wow.

And I actually got some "extras" done, too...but for the sheer joy of it, not because it was on my list. Not because I had to.

Now, how do you know when it's time for this kind of drastic shift? Physical illness. Vague symptoms. Never feeling rested. Grumpy. Ill-tempered. You know.

So, and the first day? She rested. Napped, a lot. Took meds. Shook headacke. Recovered. Put a pillow on my head and squeezed it real hard off and on, all day. Blocked sunlight. Groaned.

Second day? Played. Enjoyed. Did something new. Laughed with my family. Did not give way to stress, though it was there. Stayed caught up on "chores".

Third Day? Turned out to be a "firework finale": a class field trip with kids to the orchard.

The perfect apple Posted by Picasa

Wow. Peaceful. Beautiful. Long Gravel Roads. Amazing.

It Licked Me--Goat at the Farm "Petting Zoo"! Posted by Picasa

The kids still had their moments, actually, I had five kids all day with with me today...and, all the same "stuff" was there, but I was better for it. Ready.

Capturing sunlight beams, falling down.
Still breathing deeply, but unforced. Feeling the sun in the midst of the cold.
Seeing the joy. Laughing. Exploring. Drifting. Unstressed. Unstrained. Unworried.
Kissing silk shining hair, enjoying a now "toothless" girl singing the silly Christmas song to Daddy as he walked in the door.
Into the night, cuddling by the fire with a bowl of popcorn, an afgan, three cute "theives" in PJs.
breathing in deep scents of clean purple lavendar in their hair.

Thank You, my Lord and my God...for teaching me to celebrate. Permissing rest. Slowing me down. Showing me what in the world "balance" means.

No comments: