Raised to a a New Life

Last night I had the most delicious dream. I would not often describe my dreams that way.

I woke this morning dreaming I was being rebaptized-- by choice. We had baptisms Sunday, as we often do, but I've never dreamed about being rebaptized. I do not "need" to be rebaptized for any reason. My first baptism was solid. I was obedient following Jesus' example. I knew what I was doing, and delighted in the experience.

In my dream, explaining to others why I was being baptized again...Jesus's words were speaking to me own heart. "Die to everything, and be raised to a new life in Christ."

A nurse-angel-like handmaiden came as I was getting my items ready to go to the church to be baptized (my husband was being baptized that day as well) and insisted that everyone who was to be baptized was to be bathed first. She began drawing the water and getting the soap and wash cloth and towel out for me. It reminded me of when Jesus insisted the disciples must have their feet washed by him. We were to be clean before we were to get wet. A funny paradox, I thought...but true in spiritual terms. We must be saved before we are baptized.

The words echoed over and over in me as the alarm was going off: "Buried with Christ, and raised to a new life in Him". And I heard the words I've heard many times before by one of our minsters who always uses those same words, I understood that I have confined God to the size of being in MY life...MY heart and MY mind, and MY body--focusing on giving MY all to him, and letting him fill every part. Which is good. But he showed me that I am too small for him. I must learn to learn "IN CHRIST". In Him. Yes, it is "Christ IN ME, the hope of glory", but I am finite. He is infinite. I am small. He is large. I can only handle a certain amount of Him without short circuiting my brain and entire life...yet living IN HIM...He can handle it all. He is not too big for Himself. I don't know if you've ever come to the end of your ability to process all He's doing in and and around you...but I have. To the point of asking Him to draw back and let me live and serve my family sanely. It is my job. He chose it for me.

An interesting shift I'm not sure I am explaining well, or understanding all of just yet, but it seems significant enough to remember that I need to learn to live in Him more as He teaches me how.

Anyway...so nice to actually be refreshed and served in Christ and taught while you sleep--from the inside out. After weeks and weeks and weeks with colds and frustrating sleep, I've woken so tired and weak and uncomfortable. So weary. As a friend says, I was getting so "deep down tired".

Well, after a day away yesterday, I am quite behind. So, on to a house that needs attention, luggage that needs unpacking and washing, art lessons, soccer practice, meetings...and a day to enjoy BEING RAISED TO A NEW LIFE IN CHRIST.